TDV 8: The Phoenix Imago

January 14th, 2008 by Sharkchild

I had heard the sound of a key many times—the way it clicked when it slid into place; the way it, whether softly or quickly, depending on the hand which guided it, crashed into the perfection of angle and craftsmanship of its make. It was the sound of power; it denoted the ability of authority and ownership over property. And it was also the sound of revelation. There was no other sound better than the prophetic vision and uncanny capability of success—a method, even in madness, to the inner kingdoms of divine thought and realization.

The key had never been linked to the construct of the lock. The key, in fact, and if of the right kind, created the locks and the boundaries thereafter. Treasures were to be made, not unlocked, and rare keys held the responsibility to make it so. It was this type of key that I longed to behold: the key that had a purpose of unlocking the universe. Only one place had this key ever been found, and that was in the mind—where it was formed by aspiration, devotion, and imagination, a collection of heterogeneous parts interlocking to summate a revolutionary relationship.

I had never been satisfied with the present and primitive delusions of advancement—scientific, technological, medical, explorative. I wanted the deluge of impeccability: a change so tremendous that it would devastate all normality of life. There were certain benefits to the ephemeral pleasures of living, but my view of the eternal had a pungent taste and so I could bear no speculation of lifestyle.

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2 Responses to “TDV 8: The Phoenix Imago”

  1. avatar ron Says:

    I think you’re right on with what you’re saying and the content in general, but I can tell you a lot of people aren’t getting it because you’re going for artifice instead of communication. I think they call it philisophic nominalism, where the words, sound thereof, and I guess poetry of it all takes precidence over the meaning of the words. I mean no disrespect, I’ve been accused of the same and they were right. At the stage in which I was givent this criticism by someone I restpected very much, I was devastated. So I wrote a 15 page modern addition to Chuacer’s Canterbury Tales in perfect rhythm and wowed them. I think unless you’re wooing a potential lover, you need tell people what’s up. If you’re going for Anne Rice, I understand, I also think it’s a bad choice. Give me Steve Niles any day. Write the wisdom of a poet in the words of the comman man and you’ll have it. I must say I don’t yet, but I’m getting damn close. Thanks, I enjoyed your work. I think think that a you are well on your way. Try to think about the emotions of the characters first though, become them on purpose and say what they would say in simple words and your writing will improve 100%. I’m sure not the God of writing but I write alot and have for many years.
    Be warned that sometimes this makes you crazy. I recently wrote a 24 page jag where my main character knows he’s dying and the condition (man-made) is extremely contagious so he’s sitting around and staying away from people as much as possible. He calls the people he loves most in this world, knowing that this is likely the last time he will ever speak to them and doesn’t want to let on because
    it would hurt them. This was very hard for me. I went through every theoretical emotion as if I were that character (I am not exaggerating whatsover, I lived that scene as I wrote it and it’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. If you take on a character then write what you would do, you’re almonst taking to on as acual everience. It hurts…..alot sometimes). If you want to hear anything else I have to say, please let me know. You are just inches away from writing a great character study. Forget all you know. Sit down to write with your mind and your characters as one. I think your words dilute the strength of your work by trying to be too flowery. Don’t be flowery (unless there is a character whose dialog is of that bent). Think of yourself as a construction worker and the words as tools, rivets, etc. Try to use the simplest words that most of the actual people you know would be affected by. Simple words in what I’ve seen of your work would cut like a knife. Instead, you’ve chosen to try to impress with your vocab and groupings of words. I hope you keep writing and reading. I furthermore wish I had someone who would tell me when I’m getting away from the most effective path in my writings.

    I realize I may have made you mad, it was certainly not my intent. You have some real good elements going, but you need to learn to not give a rats ass and just say what you need to say rather than covering it with poetry. It makes the audience a third party and worse, It makes the reader concentrate on your words (thereby distracting them) when the actions the words convey are the real focus if you want to make someone feel something. I’d be glad to talk further.


    Ron Woodruff

  2. avatar ron Says:

    Here’s yours,

    Everyone finds themselves at some point in their lives wishing they were someone else, or that the circumstances that befell them were different. But we live in a time where Botox and liposuction consume a state of mind with a myth that is, more often than not, impossible to reach. We also live in a time where people change their sex, change their look, and add to their flesh, whether it be tattoos or strange grafts. People want to be more than what they are and influence the world with more than they can fathom. We should only hold the keys of those doors we know we can survive on the other side of.

    In my opinion your language holds the reader at bay. Here’s how I would say it. This is my interpretation of what I percieve you are trying to say:

    I looked down at my gut and legs and for two seconds, wished I was someone else. Not some random fuck though. No man, I wanted to look like Tito Ortiz circu 2003, except for four more inches on his skinny ass chicken legs. With a few thousand bucks and a trip to Beverly. I could probably get damn close. There wouldn’t be any Botox or any other of that Hollywood crap. I wouldn’t give those shits that power over me. What scares me away from it most though is that I’d wake up in a daze that next morning and shoot myself, thinking Tito Ortiz was invading my house. I think I learned a long time ago what comprises my body. I can’t think of a single thing that I would honestly rather have than what is here right now. This could be insane egotism but I can’t imagine anything I’d really change. I guess I kind of see it as a form of integrity. What you see is what you get, play the cards you’re dealt, motherfucker, just like in most of the midwest.

    Ok, mine was much more profanity laced, but do you see what I’m saying? I described the changes in me that could be made, made a joke about it. Stated, I wished to remain natural, and expressed the fact that I really think doing that is akin to integrity.

    Well, that’s my opinion how to state what you’re saying in the prior paragraph (profanity optional).

    Take care,

    Ron Woodruff

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